Tuesday, May 11, 2010

It's The End Of The World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine)

Look guys, I don't want to say I warned ya, but I'm warning you . . .

The apocalypse is coming.
So, be ready, k.

You see, the other day, our work email was flooded with about 15 emails (between Inbox & Junk Mail folders) containing coding and I'm pretty sure it was a subliminal message. This was the email I sent to our IT guy:

Good morning ———,

In an attempts to keep you extremely baffled yet completely busy and entertained, I thought I would forward this to you. We have about 7 emails like this in the publications inbox and they all contain jumbled codes seen below. It wouldn't normally bother me, except for the fact that I have NO clue what they are from or what is going on. The only other time I've seen an email like this was during a movie about the apocalypse. I don't think this is fortelling the end of the world, but I thought I'd let you know that we got these. Also, consider this your "I told you so," if in fact, the world ends today.

Today he came up and checked and said that he was confused by some of the hosted coding. He wondered why anyone would send an email that was completely random like that with no understandable purpose. I told him they were probably geniuses, and that I can attest to the level of genius involved, since I've successfully sent a quarter of a billion random emails to unsuspecting recipients posing as a prince from South Africa in need of money. He didn't seem to believe my credibility, but decided he would confer with the email server technicians. But for the record, I'm pretty sure they're going to plead innocent—no one REALLY wants to admit they played a role in the apocalypse.

Also today, the IT guy and I were having a conversation with other co-workers who were experiencing some strange things going on at their house. They had an influx of fleas, bugs that sounded like locusts, and currently rats. The IT guy and I decided that those incidences seemed too suspicious to be happenstance and noted the biblical allusions—you know, those miserable plagues. So, we came to the conclusion that we would keep an eye out for swirling gray clouds (which isn't so far off here in SeaTown) and do all we can to prepare for the apocalypse.

That said, I'd advise you alert your neighbors if your water turns to blood or you notice an influx of cows on their side (not from cow-tipping).

Look guys, I know it's a doomsday topic, but really—you gotta be prepared! This is so much bigger than Y2K and the Grammys. It's the apocalypse for crying out loud! I fully intend to utilize the money I have saved in my Swiss Bank Account from my Prince From South Africa scam to buy out all the Twizzlers and Dr. Pepper that will aide me until the end of the world. I advise you to do the same.

Don't believe me?

Ask these guys—They know what's up!


Sbarkley said...

haha you are too much!

Heather said...

I REALLY don't think I am supposed to LOL this much at work reading a blog I am not supposed to be reading for "lack of work" stuff and shenanigsns. Ps I wrote Shenanigans before I read your tags, I love your tags-that's a literal meaning not a "tags" meaning BTW! MUH HA HA HA

Heather said...