Thursday, April 2, 2009

We Laugh Indoors

Okay, so one of my favorite things ever is watching the David Letterman Show... more specifically, the TOP TEN LISTS!! To share the laughs, I'm including the top ten list from yesterday and one of my all-time FAVORITE top ten lists:

Top Ten Signs You Have A Lame Computer Virus (April 2, 2009)

10. Computer occasionally emits the odor of steamed clams

9. Signs onto Ebay as you; places several modest bids on Burt Reynolds memorabilia

8. Only music you can download is Kenny Loggins

7. Tech support guy says give your computer rest and plenty of fluids

6. Computer emails your friends catty comments about the size of your butt 

5. Mapquest directions always lead you to a Cinnabon in Yonkers

4. No matter what book you order on Amazon, you get Artie Lange's "Too Fat to Fish"

3. When you hit the F7 key, your pants fall down

2. Only website you can access is for "The Slanket," the blanket with sleeves

1. Replaces hilarious Top Ten jokes with entries that aren't funny

Top Ten Questions To Ask Yourself Before Ordering The Burger King Quad Stacker

10. "Are my papers in order?"

9. "Can I get it supersized?"

8. "Will I have time to run 298 miles to burn off the calories?"

7. "Could this have anything to do with why the rest of the world hates us?"

6. "Should I talk to my doctor about Lipitor?"

5. "Can I get it on a low-carb bun?"

4. "How come there isn't any sausage on this bad boy?"

3. "Why is Burger King making me sign a release form?"

2. "Should I wait til they come out with the 'Quint Stacker'?"

1. "Do I have my cardiologist on speed dial?"

go ahead... laugh! :D

1 comment:

Kelley R. said...

That Burger King list is epic.